Party of five

Party of five
Family of five

Monday, January 8, 2018

Cringeworthy

I just want to say my piece about this, because everyone is still talking about the #metoo movement. So basically, if you’ve experienced sexual assault, you put that hashtag on social media to raise awareness. 

One day when I was about late teens or 20 years old, a guy from church somehow had me against the wall. He managed to get one arm around my left side with his hand on my rear end. His other arm was up against the wall and slowly lowering. I knew he wanted to rape me, and I thought fast I ducked under the arm he had against the wall and just ran. My home was some 7 miles away, and I ran almost the whole way home. I was about 110 pounds then, and he was very overweight, so there was no way he could keep up with me. 

I ran so fast that I tripped and fell forward. I didn’t realize until I got home that my forearms were scraped and bleeding. I probably did stop running once I knew he was out of sight. The next day, I had whiplash in my neck from that fall, as if I’d been in a car accident. I was running that fast. 

To the people I knew, I only said I’d been chased by a pit bull. He was a very important person in the church, and it was shortly before I left anyway. But when I told other women in some kind of group back then, they shamed me and thought I insinuated that all women could get away. Perhaps it’s because I kept describing “fight or flight” as a natural instinct to kick in. I never, ever, thought that every woman could escape rape. I was young and fit, whereas he was older and not fit at all. The position of his arm gave me a quick escape. 

It’s because “I got away” that I didn’t do the “#metoo” thing, and I told some people why. They told me to still put it, because I was still “assaulted”. I still refused. I felt more “assaulted” by being told I must think every woman could do as I did. 

Some people think too much in black and white. 

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